A sh*tty situation…

Lincoln crapped in the tub.  Sorry for the lack of intro, but seriously, I’m still trying to get over what happened, forgive me.  Besides, is there even a nice way to say that your child took a dump while taking a bath?  Didn’t think so.

Also, I have a question.  Does this mean I am officially part of some underground motherhood?  Is there a plaque I get, or an honorary mention of some sort, because I think I deserve something!  I’ve changed hundreds of diapers {I have never counted, I’m just ball parking here} but there is something far more…slimy and runny, about cleaning up a bath time poop, am I right?

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?  I blame multitasking.  I had just started to drain the tub, and was right outside the bathroom, sitting with Wyatt.  After a few minutes, and knowing the water was long gone, I looked over to see Lincoln playing, quite intently.  {If I’ve learned anything as a mother, it’s to suck every freaking second possible out of bath time.}   I didn’t want to deal with a temper tantrum, so I left him.  There I sat, having somewhat of a proud mommy moment; both of my children were happy, at the same time, little did I know, one was playing with his feces.

After a solid 15 minutes, I finally got up, walked into the bathroom, grabbed a towel and approached the tub.  That’s when I saw it.  Everywhere.  Without any thought, I opened my mouth and screamed, “OH MY GOD, YOU SH*T IN THE TUB!!”  Tears, instantaneously.  I’m positive that if he hadn’t just emptied his bowels, that would have done the trick.  I stood there, cursing {under my breath this time} and debated what my first move should be.  I mean, is there even a right way to go about dealing with a bath time poo-mergency?  Couldn’t tell ya.  I snatched Lincoln up, bathed him in my bathroom, and left the rest to Jason.  Please, don’t feel bad for my husband.  I was in charge of scraping poo out from underneath tiny fingernails.  The duties were evenly distributed. {Haha..see what I did there?}

At least I can say it was a learning experience; Lincoln gets startled when someone shouts profanities at him, Jason is a SUPERB cleaning man, and as for me, well, I clearly suck at multitasking.  I’ll be sure to add it to my list of “things I should probably, but won’t, work on,” it’s quite the list, as I’m sure you can imagine.

3 thoughts on “A sh*tty situation…”

  1. Okay so fortunately I have never experienced the poop in the tub or the crib! But as for screaming and using a potty mouth I am guilty! It is fun to read your blog. It takes me back and helps me to realize as it should you too that we aren’t perfect. We will make mistakes. But thankfully we can always say I’m sorry! You’re an awesome mom and an awesome writer. Keep sharing! And thanks for being real and honest because some days are just shi!!y🤣

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s